Garbage

The other day I went to grab something from underneath the kitchen sink and noticed that it was a little damp down there. I thought, "huh, maybe we have a little leak down there." I mentioned it to Dave. He said he'd look at it.

Fast forward about a month to this past weekend. That's about how long it's been since we've had a Saturday at home. I finally got the house clean and was putting the granite cleaner away under the kitchen sink when I noticed yet again that it was pretty damp under the sink. I made a mental note to look into it on Monday when I had a little more time.

Well, today is Monday. And the puddle of smelly, sludgy water under the sink reminded me that I needed to look into the dampness under the sink. What I found was not pretty: the garbage disposal had sprung a leak.

My suspicions are that it began as a small, slow leak and grew into the massive food dumping leak that it currently is. When I opened up the door and pulled out the little drawer under the sink that holds all of our cleaning supplies, I realized that there was a nice pile of water, spoiled food, and mold gracing the underside of our sink. I could not handle this on my own. I grabbed my phone to call Dave. He answered like he didn't know who it was.

"Good morning."

"It is NOT a good morning, honey."

"What's the matter?"

"The garbage disposal is broken."

"Like how broken?"

"Like spoiled mashed up food under the sink broken."

"Are you sure?"

I wished there was some sort of smell sensor that came with the iOS6 update.

"Yeah, I'm sure."

"Well, just leave it until I get home. I'll take care of it."

It was too late. I had already awoken the monster. I couldn't ignore the putrid moldy food smell that was now permeating what five minutes earlier I had believed was a clean kitchen.

"Can you see where the leak is coming from?"

Stupidly, I turned on the garbage disposal, sending another round of spray to join what was already there. I gagged.

"Yeah. We need to buy a new one. I'm going to Costco."

"Don't go without me. I'll take care of it when I get home."

I tried to mop up the pooling "water" and some sludge flicked out onto the floor. I threw up in the sink, which of course then made its way down to the garbage disposal.

"Are you throwing up?"

More gagging and spitting.

"Honey, meet me at the clinic in an hour for lunch. And bring the candy that's in the garage; I forgot to grab it this morning." And that was that. Had he really just left me alone on the phone while I was throwing up in the sink? I felt so abandoned. So...alone.

I went into my dad's room (who is living with us for a few months until his house here in STG is finished) and informed him that the sink was unusable until Dave could get home and fix it. I must have looked a little green because he asked if he could help. I handed him the old towel I was getting ready to use and said, "only if you really want to. He got on his hands and knees and we conquered the underside of the sink together. I hosed down the drawer outside and he wiped out the spray of moldy food. We got most of the food out and sprayed down the entire underside of the sink to disinfect it. We both left the house to get away from the smell.

I met Dave at the clinic, storm cloud over head. He hugged me, smiling, and said, "What's the matter?"

Really?

"Um, moldy food. Garbage disposal broken. Me throwing up on the phone?"

"Oh, right. I'm sorry honey. You should have just left it for me."

"You hung up on me. You hung up on me when I was throwing up." Unsaid: are you going to do this when I'm pregnant? Unsaid, but he could see the question in my eyes.

"Honey,"--the familiar look of him fighting back laughter--"I thought you wanted to go throw up somewhere other than the sink. I really did. So I thought I'd let you go take care of it. I'm sorry that I made the wrong choice." He knows I hate throwing up. He's also always doing disgusting things to get me to gag, so I knew he wasn't that sorry.

"You're not sorry." He was moving his mouth to try to keep his lips in a serious, straight line. My storm cloud got darker.

"Honey, I really am sorry that you threw up. But I did tell you to wait for me to come home. I would have dealt with it. Where do you want to go for lunch?"

Needless to say, I didn't eat a whole lot.  Being a homeowner kind of sucks sometimes.